by Paul Revere

Years ago, Dana Carvey summed up the O.J. Simpson trial:

“We’ve got a mountain of evidence over here, and Johnny Cochrane’s like, ‘Why are we even having a trial?’”

There is a mountain of evidence why Barack Obama should not be president; Agiant mountain of evidence. His own running mate said about Obama “the presidency is not a job that lends itself to on the job training.” Biden even admitted that Hillary Clinton would be a better candidate that him.

 Aside from my 22 point collection of disqualifications (see below: “Suspending Disbelief”), David Kupelian wrote an outstanding article on the trance-like power of envy in this election here (please read it, it’s excellent). But strange thing is that Barack supporters everywhere are totally glazed over at the prospect of “President Obama”. Hey I’d like to see the first black president in my lifetime, but I just want him (or her) to be the first qualified black president.

 I think if Barack was videotaped in a lesbian sandwich on top of a nuke-filled crate with the words, “To Obama, Love Osama” on the side, Barack supporters would wildly applaud his ability to reach out and really connect with disparaged groups.

 I think if Obama was videotaped shooting heroin while knifing small children, his supporters would gush that he understands the plight of the underclass and they’d applaud his expansion of post-birth-abortion.

 It is just freaky the level of complete blind devotion to someone so far removed from American ideals.

 I think if Barack signed over all U.S. sovereignty to the United Nations, gave all our nuclear supplies to Iran (for “peaceful purposes,” of course), and changed our national anthem to “Hitler Had a Point,” his supporters would say, “That’s cool. We deserve don’t deserve anything. In fact, Obama understands how arrogant we are in the world, and this is his gracious plan to humble us and improve our status in the world. We’re better for it. We should give all our riches away, because we are so bad and the rest of the world is so good.” That’s why Barack was so well received in Germany.

 I think if Obama himself said, “God damn America,” he would be elevated to supreme potentate of the Universal Church of Barack. And millions would come to lay at his feet.

 Oh wait, his worshippers are already here. Quick, drink the kool-aid.


 Why are we even having an election?

 ‘Cuz this guy cannot be allowed to hold the highest office in the land.